God is big
Very big - beyond our comprehension.
Isaiah 55:9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."
And yet this very big God desires a relationship with us.
The Christian message of love and hope can be summarised in a few pages - have a look at this presentation.
To find out more about the Christian message you might want to consider meeting other people with similar questions on a Christianity Explored or Alpha course.
If there isn't a course near you, or you don't want to go to one at the moment, have a look at the following books:
Christianity Explored books a jargon-free introduction to Jesus Christ and the twelve most frequently asked questions about God.
Searching Issues by Nicky Gumbel (founder of Alpha). He tackles the seven most common objections to the Christian faith, including suffering, other religions and sex before marriage.
The Shack is an excellent fictional book that tackles the issue of suffering.
Questions of Life Book by Nicky Gumbel. This book contains the talks from the Alpha course, including some of the key questions we will face when we give consideration to the claims of Christianity.
I want to know Jesus personally - a description of the Gospel message, the Good News of Jesus.
Or go to the Consider the Evidence section of this site.
Try talking to God. You could pray something like this:

Dear God,
I'm sorry for all the bad stuff that I think and do,
please forgive me.
Thank you for sending Jesus to die for me that I may be forgiven.
I turn to you and accept Jesus as my Saviour and Lord.
Please change me and help me.
Amen